Interview with the Vampire: The real screenplay, by me

Neil Jordan, director of Interview with the Vampire, introduces the film on the DVD by saying that the characters are "the saddest vampires you'll ever see."  I think he meant to say that the vampires were UNHAPPY, but I cracked up because they're actually the most PATHETIC and RIDICULOUS vampires I've ever seen. Needless to say, I enjoyed the movie a lot more than I enjoyed Bram Stoker's Dracula [a.k.a. Coppola's Love Fest of Heaving Bosoms and Red Water]. Here is the real screenplay:

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